Emotions — a tool or a weapon of mass destruction?

Emotions difficult to manage, you can hardly force yourself to feel or not to feel something. But man is quite capable of handling displays of emotion. But not all consider it necessary to do this.

Marta Ketro

Marta Ketro
Columnist cosmo.ru


Share with your friends

Join the discussion


Cosmo recommends

  • Вместо косухи: 9 коротких дублёнок под джинсы и платья

    Instead of the jackets: 9 short sheepskin under jeans and dresses

  • «Бабушкин» кардиган: 11 стильных моделей, которые согреют тебя зимой

    “Grandma” cardigan: 11 stylish models that will warm you in the winter

Marta Ketro
Not news
Эмоции — инструмент или оружие массового поражения?

Emotion is now in Vogue. And, admittedly, deserved: highly sentient and manifesting himself, the man is more interesting and brighter restrained dry. We tend to empathize with those who are not afraid to show your weaknesses, fears, generously shares her sorrows and troubles. Especially in Networks where many unfamiliar but attractive characters. In a sense it is, of course, like the show: the actor jumps, yells, cries and laughs, and you sit in the front row with a bag of popcorn and watch. But it’s hard to stay detached spectator, gradually get involved and start spending on performance mental strength. In Facebook you can day by day read hysterical girls and one day to catch myself on the fact that really worried — that she was “horrified” by what has lost its perfect comb (these people are all either perfect or terrible), “Lancome” was discontinued favorite lipstick and my neighbor’s dog shat under the door. And you seriously think, poor man, what a streak, it would be necessary to assist, a comb or something to give! Despite the fact that your car broke down, grandma in hospital, at work coming downsizing — but you’re right, and she’s going through!

Remember met on Facebook one lady who “suffered terribly” on every occasion, “was really nervous” and “deeply felt”, and somewhere in the background of her tragic stories dangled blunt dull husband, who didn’t share and did not sympathize with some, apparently, chauffeur or mechanic. But it is something an accountant, mental work man! Imagine my surprise when a couple of years on third party references, I realized that this “ordinary mattress” Victor is a good, fairly well-known poet. In his texts a lot of reflection and depth — real, meaningful, and not those of epileptic pools, which are readily snapped his wife. She didn’t even have enough mind for them to be proud of, not that understanding his poems. Spared but everything around it.

Emotions perfectly sell: for customers much more attractive psychologists, coaches, and any sort of trainers that can vividly describe your successes, failures, and all the feelings about this. Professionals know this trick and are shamelessly exploiting. Judging by their page, they always feel very tired and orgasmic satisfied by resting, fighting in fits of exuberant delight or despair, are experiencing a stunning Epiphany, all around the common everyday events and simple thoughts. And the client comes to him with a request: teach me to be as open and attractive. In fact, it often means “teach me to scream so that everyone could hear”. Well, that, too, is a survival tool like any other.

So emotions are to attack. Sorrowful cries and sobs absolutely boggle the mind of many people, they are ready to do anything to stop it. And even the fact that the tears dry instantly as soon as the sufferer will get what they want, doesn’t change anything — he was crying, so was really desperate. Cautious people find it hard to imagine that someone has a special button, enable/disable fountain. And it is.

And even if you do not try to blackmail other people’s emotions still are toxic. When a friend often translates panic, easily gets angry, gets offended, it’s hard to ignore. In ten minutes she calms down and “forgive all who have”, and you have an hour sit with a strange face, so boring. She is easily appeased, and your emotional swing swing slow and also hard to stop. The question arises: how many of you “normal”? The one who instantly boils, spills over and cools, or whoever reactions slow and deep?

I think normal person who is not poisoning the lives of others. I don’t stand for something, not to show emotions, without it boring to live (and exercise, and observers). But there is a time and place. To portray such a drama Queen on his blog or in front of loving people as they want. Yelling at the seller, because pissed off (was not quick, but you have a bad mood) — alas. Bellowing at him because you are all so choppy. To yell at the doctor because you have nerves. Situations where your emotions you have to put in your purse, set, to define them by one simple sign. In its manifestations, you are either polite or not. Politeness does not equal stiffness, it’s just habit not to push and not to manipulate. Feel health, but only so that the outsiders did not put the ears when you just upset about the coffee quality. Do not need special permission to cry in sorrow, laugh with joy, scream from fear. But to lose the human form due to careless words, and to come down on people for nothing — rude, and no emotion is no excuse.