Still think that to be a good girl good and bad — bad? You are deeply mistaken: bad girls have traits that are worth to learn from. Especially if you’re a good girl.
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Rational egoism, of course. The main problem with good girls is the desire to be all good. Otherwise for what it will be like? Why the good girl always thinks of others — she never thinks of himself. She had no time, and she is exhausted. All the forces it spends to guess the desires of the loved ones and fulfill them as quickly as possible. A bad girl thinks first about himself, and it’s not bad. Selfishness is a completely natural mechanism that will work for the benefit, if you do not try to break him down and get to spinning in the opposite direction. Remember the airplane rule? First put on your oxygen mask on yourself, then on a child or a neighbor, if the neighbor is unable to do it. If you think primarily about yourself, you have enough resources and others. And Vice versa it does not work: if to think only of others, for himself nothing.
Bad girl very clearly able to distinguish the important things from the necessary. And to remain indifferent to this most important things, if they prevent her to do what’s necessary. Bad girl pulls out of the bag last thousand rubles to buy a pack fodder in a cat shelter. A bad girl doesn’t waste emotional resources to absolutely convince strangers that they are deeply wrong in doing so-and-so. Good girl really wants to be good, so does that. The question is, what is bad? What a good girl is exhausted emotionally, sharply reacting to every case of injustice in this world. Poor girl, probably to someone helps too, but realizes that her modest forces will not suffice to save all mankind (and the animal with the vegetable world at the same time). Well, because that is the reality. No need to get involved in something you don’t, because you’re going to go, and it was completely you Deplete.
The ability to say “no”
Bad girl easy life, because she knows how to do one very important thing: telling people “no”. Good girls do not get it. It may be wanted, but a couple of times decided that it’s not worth it. Because a good girl first, someone will refuse, and then begin to worry: not offended if she’s a good person for nothing? And do you agree? What now think? This endless inner monologue is a fertile soil for feelings of guilt. A good girl it grows to such a size, so pressing that it is literally impossible to breathe. So the next time a nice girl agrees with anyone on any issue, if only to avoid these nightmarish experiences. The problem is that it will still have to go through, but for another reason: it is obvious that people are not able to refuse anyone, sooner or later will end up in trouble.
Bad girl knows how to open his mouth and just say: go screw yourselves, dear fellow citizens. Good girl in a conflict situation lost and never finds the right words. But because it silently swallows her pride, and then comes home and starts to endlessly scroll through the situation. But the analysis of the conflict after the fact the girl doesn’t help because after it starts the session of self-flagellation: the only thing after a fight with their fists, you pussy! That something says a good girl, and ultimately trivial domestic conflict swells to the size of a local disaster. That, of course, peace of mind does not add.
Good girl is much more independent than bad. She must have learned in school (and my mom did not have to stand over her all night to make homework), she entered University and graduated brilliantly. And work at it precisely is, and good. The problem is that the good girl got ‘ em not because they wanted to, but because I have to. Be. This is the sense of duty sometimes raises good girls on some inaccessible peaks. From which they then fall down, breaking her spine. Because we are so constituted: we can have a long and fruitful only engage in if we enjoy it. If not, we for some time go on the exhaust: “that’s what I have done, do what you must!” — vykraivaya crumbs of fun there, and then all of them. The motor stalls. Hello, depression! Bad girl at some point she decides what she would like. She won’t listen to mom, husband or friend. It will choose your path and be happy. And if not, at least won’t regret not tried what you want. But no regrets — this is happiness too. Which we all seek. Such cases.