Old and fat: at what age do we stop being young

Where is the limit after which you no longer feel thin and twangy? Every woman is their own.

Marta Ketro

Marta Ketro

Columnist cosmo.ru

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Marta Ketro
Psychology
Not news
Старые и толстые: в каком возрасте мы перестаём быть молодыми

I have always been good with numbers and memory, so I know exactly when I first felt the weight of age. Once I read the book a meaningful phrase: “Everything that happens to a person after thirteen years, does not matter”. As a decent Russian child, I believed the printed word, so paradoxical prettiness struck in the heart. So, in a year already all over? And if nothing important is going on with me right now, it’s not going to happen? I have certainly been a rich inner life. Remember standing on the balcony, bitterly staring into the spring night and told an adult brother, not expecting any surprises from the fate I’ve tried everything. And not really understand why the young man looks at me real funny. Maybe shocked by my wisdom?

But it is not only in my naivety and pompous books. I remember my first husband said leniently: “Yeah, at sixteen you were like a peach, and now, of course, is not the same”. Then I, in a vain attempt to decorate herself for the first time in my life, colored her cheeks, rubbed her handkerchief on the red pencil — the usual blush in the house did not yet exist. I was nineteen.

I remember when my sister began to receive the first accusations that remains a spinster. She was twenty-two.

Remember how in response to my displeasure with our marriage, the husband sadly said: “What can we now go on to live quietly, where we twitch”. I was twenty-six.

What to excess weight, then for the first time in my life I started losing weight when I was forty-three pounds — I realized that I needed forty. The mirror showed a round ass and large Breasts, but inside I was almost a boy: thin, with wide straight shoulders, thin hips and short brown hair. Hair I left alone, but the body was drilled very seriously. A liter of yogurt, a handful of almonds, oranges and “French salad beauty” (three tablespoons of oatmeal soaked in water and grated Apple) was my daily diet for several years.

I have almost no photos of myself anywhere did not like, always turned out I did not, and what they want chubby peony with soft spout, so ruthlessly they tore. But some still remained, and gradually I began to notice things. Yes, now, of course, is not peach, but five years ago, look, there was nothing. And ten in General, and than a fool, were dissatisfied. Sorry, no time to return, nothing gnawed himself, and now it is too late to start to enjoy life, now that I’ve gotten older.

The key word, as you know, here “stupid”. And if I write this text, does not mean that finally wised up. And in the final there will be an optimistic call to love and accept yourself as is. Because I may not very smart, but never lie unnecessarily.

Some of us do not given unconditional acceptance of own appearance, adipositivity and faith that life is here and now. Man is imperfect and age it is too short in time to learn from their mistakes. Idiotic mantra “I am the most charming and attractive” and will remain idiotic mantras, if you live in a fantasy world of ideals, which is impossible to match.

But please, remember this one simple thing. Now is your “ten years ago”. No matter how much is drawn in the passport and on the scale how tired unhappy and sad feeling. After ten years, and you’ll look back on this time with great tenderness. You will be shocked at how many good and bright has happened over the years, how much joy made its way to you in spite of secret depression and low self-esteem. It is not excluded that in ten years you will become happier, freer and more beautiful, it happens. But those years when you are vulnerable, sad and not sure is worth its weight in gold. Stop measuring yourself it is better to look at the beautiful and reverent world around and inside you. The person is free not to love ourselves, but the joys in the world is not getting any less, and it is only our choice to close the door on them because we are not “quality” on some of its scale, or let them happen.

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