Shopping is a favorite pastime of many of those who read these lines now. But is it always harmless (except that for purchases the money is spent)? Apparently not. Our heroine, the new Yorker, tells what has become of this hobby in her case.
Share with your friends
Join the discussion
Dream pilot: 7 light summer bomber for any occasion
A party and a date: 6 feminine summer coat
“From the beginning, I spent a huge amount on shoes, clothing, furniture and other things that I can hardly remember. And I was not told about it to family and friends. Well, at least considered, and could spend more!
To explain what is compulsive shopping, it is enough to describe my every day. For example, I saw a woman with beautiful and expensive bag. Its logo flashed in the sun, and the brand brought it back for me. I froze in anticipation of a new quest, another interesting job. Bag worth a lot, I tried to forget her. But an hour later, still roamed the sites in search of discounts that were not. Deciding to distract myself… went to look for another bag, in white leather! It cost about the same but I convinced myself that this is the best investment since it will fit the laptop. Yes, the closet had a dozen bags of this size, but this was not! I added it to the basket.
Here it is, the phase of mania — when I want to buy something, can’t think of anything
Here it is, the phase of mania — when I want to buy something, I can’t bear to think about anything. To buy it? Another? No? It’s just a bag, but the anxiety becomes real. I convinced myself that I can just close the website and not to buy anything. But I want to! More precisely, my feelings can be described as a cross between “want” and “need”.
And, as usually happens, the next step was quick to place your order, pay on the website. In this moment I feel a slight disappointment because of how much money is spent.
Bag arrived through the day, I absentmindedly looked at it and put it in the closet. The need for shopping means no need for specific things, and the necessity of the purchase process. A list of what I was going to buy, grow with each passing day, home constantly came messengers, the apartment was littered with new things.
Today’s world only provoke shoppers to purchase! If you bind a map to the site or to use the modern payment system, you can not even go for his wallet. I live in a big city where you can often order a delivery for today. I get e-mails writing about the things left in a basket on the sale that I was looking at the website. Sometimes I ordered the thing, and in the morning couldn’t remember what she got me so attracted.
I know you will say: Yes this is the problem? I’m just privileged the consumer, who must test her superpowers. I am also so comforted. The truth is, shopping only covers other problems (in my case depression and anxiety disorder). To control this pain have to come up with a defense mechanism. In my case it was the problem.
I must say, I always loved to fly. I adopted my mother’s passion for shopping, and she got it from her mother
I must say, I always loved to fly. I adopted my mother’s passion for shopping, and she got it from her mother. My childhood was spent in stores, where salespeople knew us by name. “See something you like, take two,” my mother told me.
The need to spend money do not interfere with my relationships or career. I’ve always been able to pay the bills thanks to the good work and the non-poor parents.
In January last year I quit my beloved job and got another, while starting to work with your Shopaholic. Things have captured my home, I began to feel the futility of shopping.
I continued to convince myself that it’s not so bad like gambling or drugs. But the day came when I couldn’t pay my bills on a credit card. The more I captured, the shopping, the more expensive things became. Surrounding thought that the money is in the Bank… well, the heart that before I was saved, turned into a problem that is disturbing you.
And then I had an idea: I have an investment account opened by parents for retirement, but it’s possible to withdraw money without penalties. Once it is possible!
Of course, plugging financial holes quickly transformed into permission to continue to spend. One time I did not stop, and soon my pension Fund was empty. I imagined myself in old age, lonely, trying to survive, because once I spent all the money on things. Head started to come to the unpleasant thoughts…
Disorder compulsive shopping is not considered a medical diagnosis because not well understood. It is believed that people can just stop buying, but the problem is much more serious. When you buy something, the dopamine puts you in a pleasant state of euphoria. And eventually get used to it.
Shopping — legitimate occupation, uplifting
Shopping — legitimate lesson of uplifting. That is why this disorder is treated with a grin: let’s say, any hobby is considered a bad habit. They say that these people just don’t know how to count money.
This summer I realized that we needed to act decisively, though it is very hard. I unsubscribed from all emails, deleted apps for shopping from a smartphone and chose not to apply to the Bank.
At first it was just. Then I was nearly broke, but very time occurred the conversation with an old friend we found out that are perfectly suited to each other. And I realized that life is sufficient for me a couple of dresses and some sunglasses.
I told them about my problem the therapist (and before I was embarrassed to admit even to him!). A big part of the wardrobe so I sold it on the map now always a plus.
The white leather bag was very heavy and I was afraid to get dirty. But now I go with her everywhere: she reminds me of those hard times and that one I don’t need anymore!”